Borderlands Quotes

On the topic of the topping for popcorn at his movie theater:
I use “I Can't Believe It's Not Evil!” – Chucky (Doug)
Evil? ……PARKAY! – Obediah (Paul)

Two two-star movies make four stars – Chucky

I will emerge from the alley, having vanquished another fishy foe – Obediah

Didn't know my name was Long Gulp, did you? – Obediah

OK, Crazy Guys! Good Morning! – Fitz (Brian)

Upon revealing the department store that featured in Fitz's dream
Of course it's Macy's! – Joshua (the GM)

Considering the fact that she's a mannequin, I don't think I'm in any real danger – Fitz
I want you all to remember he said that – GM

No, I not here to play…I here for conversation – Chucky, doing his shtick

Upon the Paul unveiling yet another plan to try and gain information by having somebody else's character seduce an NPC:
If it isn't the burning, it's the pimping… – GM

The Menace at Macy’s: Gaming summary for 4/25/04

Well, this blog is moving along in stunning fashion, isn’t it? After just one post in January and another in February, it was reasonable to hope that the 7 posts in March might be the start of a trend, but here we are at the end of April with nary a post to be seen. Scott and Rachel must think we’ve all died, or lost all interest in role-playing. I take some of the responsibility for this on myself, since I have taken on the role of the chronicler of the “Borderlands” campaign, yet I have only managed to attend one session this month. I will do my best not to let this happen again.

I’m told there’s a game going on during the Sunday nights that I don’t attend, but nobody is summarizing that, so I have no evidence of it. Come on, guys, I can only game every other week, give me some vicarious gaming to read while I’m supposed to be working.

Wendy, feel free to post the quotes from the Borderlands campaign so far; I’ve already forgotten most of them.

So here’s the summary for last night’s session, which featured not only our first actual combat in this campaign, but also the first earned point of Mojo (to Doug). Unfortunately, said point of Mojo was expended just moments later to prevent Doug’s untimely death, but nobody’s perfect. Extra kudos to Doug for attending a gaming session fresh from a 27-hour flight back from Australia. He didn’t even stop home first, people! That’s dedication! I’ve also switched from present tense to past tense for the summary. Why? Because I felt like it.

Continue reading “The Menace at Macy’s: Gaming summary for 4/25/04”

The Menace at Macy’s: Gaming summary for 3/28/04

I’m going to try the fancy “extended entry” feature for this summary, because it may get long. We’ll see how it works.

Continue reading “The Menace at Macy’s: Gaming summary for 3/28/04”

Horoscopes

reposted from Wendy's post to the mailing list
Hey, let's play the peculiarly appropriate horoscope game! Fun and
entertaining reading of today…

Leo: Some strange dreams that come your way, dear Leo, could stimulate
your imagination and start you off in new avenues of exploration. You
might at some point find yourself playing detective. The quarry you're
after, however, is more likely to be within your own psyche, so don't
be surprised if you learn new things about yourself that you hadn't
been previously aware of. You could also find your psychic faculties
increasing.

The Mystery of the Chinese Movie Theater: Gaming summary for 3/14/03

What follows is my summary of the gaming events of this past Sunday (3/14). I don’t have all the names in place yet, and I may have gotten some details wrong. Feel free to let me know, and I’ll edit.

The scene: Early on a sunny weekday afternoon. A cut-rate movie theater in Chinatown, New York City. A street performer named Gabe stands outside with his trumpet, playing for change. In the lobby, the theater owner, Lei “Chucky” Fei, sweeps up. Inside, Tim “Fitz” Fitzgerald is watching the first half of a double-feature. Across the street, Wendy is reading a book while on her lunch hour. Onto this scene bursts Obediah, an older homeless man with a wild look in his eyes (although he doesn’t smell).

Obediah crosses the street to where Gabe is playing and asks him for a drink. Gabe (sensing the PC glow about Obediah) complies. Obediah asks Gabe if he’s going to do anything about the miasma of evil surrounding the theater. Gabe hadn’t noticed the miasma before (because of his drunken state), but does so now, and is quite startled, by the evil itself, and the fact that Obediah can see it. (Gabe has been seeing things that aren’t there for some time, but has written it off as insanity or the effects of drink.) Obediah and Gabe get into an argument about the nature of the evil, which attracts Chucky, who attempts to shoo them away from his property by yelling at them in broken English. The yelling draws Fitz out of the theater to watch, since he isn’t much interested in the 30s noir film that’s currently showing (he’s waiting for the chop-socky film that comes next). Now that the commotion has disturbed Chucky’s paying customer, his attempts to rid himself of the two vagrants increase in volume. Obediah is adamant that the theater is “EEEEE-villll,” and announces this loudly, from the middle of the street. Wendy arrives on the scene at this time, carrying her book, and inquires if Chucky is all right. During the discussion, Obediah insults Gabe’s musical talents, and Gabe responds with a horn solo that nearly blows the paint off the building. At this time, everything goes black. The sun itself is extinguished and all the power goes out. Wendy pulls out her lighter. A few moments later, the sun reappears, and the power comes back on. The PCs, obviously, are startled by this turn of events.

Chucky attempts to convince the other PCs that the sun-going-dark thing was just a fluke (he succeeds), and then tries to convince the vagrants to go away, and Fitz to go back to the movie (he doesn’t succeed). Fitz (using a condescending tone) wants Obediah to be more specific about the nature of the evil, which now seems to be gone. Obediah responds by charging into the theater and upstairs, followed by Fitz. Once upstairs, Obediah cleans a dirty window with his sleeve, and looks out to see 1930s New York. Further investigation reveals a Chinese vampire stuck in a broom closet, with a prayer scroll tacked to its forehead, keeping it immobile. Fitz, who doesn’t know from prayer scrolls, is alarmed and draws a katana from the depths of his coat, startling the other PCs, who have now arrived on the scene. Chucky slams the closet door and demands that everyone leave, explaining that everything is under control. Fitz, waving the katana around carelessly, demands explanations. Obediah may be demanding explanations also, but nobody can really understand what he’s saying, so he goes exploring some more. Wendy, showing remarkable disdain for the guy with the sword, takes Chucky’s side and tries to push Fitz back to the lobby, getting a slice on her sleeve in the process. Gabe drinks. A lot.

Obediah continues to look around, and Gabe wanders off as well. Wendy follows Obediah, but Fitz won’t let Chucky leave until he provides some explanation for the vampire. Fitz claims to have some experience in these matters, and asserts that everyone is in danger, but Chucky is having none of it. Obediah finds a storeroom full of arcane junk and normal cleaning supplies, and Wendy summons Chucky to control him. Fitz takes advantage of the opportunity to ask Wendy if she doesn’t find anything odd about all this strange stuff in the theater. Wendy continues to believe the word of Chucky, whose family has owned the theater for generations, over Fitz, a guy she’s never seen before who’s waving a sword around.

Abandoning the storeroom, Obediah goes back upstairs, where Wendy sees the 1930s view out the window, and finally starts to express concern. Gabe and Fitz see it as well, but they can’t get any more concerned than they already are. (Actually, Gabe runs out of booze at about this point, which concerns him more than anything else going on.) The demands for explanations continue, and Obediah pokes around some more, eventually finding a room that contains a swirly temporal vortex. The ensuing wind and Giant Sucking Sound attract the attention of the people in the hallway. Chucky drops his (very, very bad) fake Engrish speech pattern to mutter “Aw, crap” as he runs toward the door and slams it shut. Unfortunately, there’s a wiggly tentacle jammed in the door. Chucky switches to plain, unaccented English and lays out a plan. Chucky will open the door quickly, and Fitz will stab whatever is on the other side. If the Whatever fights back, Fitz is to let go of his sword. Chucky yanks the door open, Fitz stabs, as requested, and the Whatever pulls back into the vortex, taking Fitz’s mall-bought katana with it. Chucky slams the door and realizes that he’s not going to get these people to leave now.

Gabe and Obediah take up residence at the theater, with Obediah running the popcorn machine (with the “I Can’t Believe It’s Not Evil” topping). Fitz expresses dismay that although he’s learned a bit about European-variety demons, this Chinese stuff is new to him, and begs Chucky for lessons. Wendy states that Chucky knows where she is if he needs her. Chucky laments that the day started out well, before the crazies showed up.

Borderlands Updates

I’ve updated the Borderlands stuff with some new info, including Brian’s suggested mundane shticks.

Borderlands Rules

The Borderlands

I’ve posted some of the write-up of the new setting at the link above. Take a look, and let me know what you think.

Excellent Vancouver Andventure, II

[Read the other part first, chums!]

Oh, the situation was dire indeed: my character, Ham, was imprisoned in the oubliette for a murder he didn’t commit, and Scott’s character, Benel, couldn’t have cared less! And this had been the adventure where I hoped to demonstrate that not all my thief characters are evil! **sob!**

Fortunately, I was released from my prison by the Dolphin steward’s humongous cousin, who believed I was too stupid to have killed anyone and told me to flee to the lower city. I trudged around underground, making for the docks, and encountered no monsters thanks to a merciful GM.

Benel, meanwhile, looked for employment elsewhere. First he tried the House of Otter, but they were in mourning. Then he tried the House of Octopus, where he was able to convince them to hire him to write a dirge honoring the fallen Otter steward. They said yes, as long as it was also an acrostic. He came up with:

O T T E R
T O W R E
T W I G S
E R G O T
R E S T S

Um. Yeah. His versifying was, amazingly, better.

I reached the docks, had a bath, found an inn, and slept. Benel, working on his acrostic in a tavern, was informed of my escape and my innocence. Gullible as he was, he believed every word (of course, it happened to be true…). Did he set out to look for me? No, he bought himself a drink.

Later, he went looking for the dolphin steward, who wasn’t in. He left the steward a note saying “Ham is not the real killer! If you need me, I’ll be down by the docks, alone!” He went walking by the docks. He was found later, his throat slit.

Upon seeing his corpse, I ran to the steward’s cousin to offer my services finding the real killer. He informed me he didn’t need an imbecile helping him. He gave me some money, and I went back to the inn, where I awaited the arrival of spring…

Excellent Vancouver Adventure

During his visit to Vancouver, Josh led Rachel and myself on a two-character adventure set in Harmody in the world of Neng. I played Benel the Elder, a 55-year-old bard/storyteller from Loiborra. Rachel played Ham, a thief whom I trustingly hired as my bodyguard. (Gullibility is one of my character’s flaws.) Ham was also a skilled poisoner — think Zekel the Zekarian. Upon entering Harmody, I presented myself to the Great House of Dolphin, where I arranged to perform a 4-night epic ballad to commemorate the mercantile alliance between the Houses of Dolphin, Otter, and Octopus. We received lodging in the visitor’s part of the palace.

One evening as Ham was wandering about, and while I was getting beat up by a jug band in a taverna, someone apparently came into our room and rifled through our stuff without taking anything. Ham took it onto himself to ask around, and to search the room of another house guest, whom he concluded must have been behind this. The guest, who turned out to be the steward’s cousin, discovered Ham in the act, to which Ham responded: “Somebody rifled through my bags, so now I’m here to rifle through yours.” The other guest concluded that Ham was mentally defective, and meant no harm. Ham then went to harass the steward of the House about how our room had been searched. The steward denied that this could have been possible, and he and Ham took a strong dislike to each other. Ham was in fact thrown into the oubliette for the night, but let out the next day. Ham then swore terrible revenge against the steward within hearing of a chambermaid. Foolish Ham.

The steward and I agreed that given what had happened, it would be best if Ham left the House to find other lodging. Ham reluctantly agreed, but secretly decided to sneak around the house and get revenge. To further this peculiar goal, Ham stole a maid’s outfit, dressed as a maid (despite being a man and having no skill in disguise), and was sneaking around the House. I uncovered Ham in my room, and insisted that he leave. He then promptly crawled out a window while still wearing the maid’s outfit.

That evening the performance went splendidly. I actually wrote out my verses. Let me record the first several lines of the poem that Benel actually performed for the assembled dignitaries in the House of Dolphin:

Back when the world was young
Many songs were once sung
Of Krokan of the House of Otter
Who had a lovely daughter
That betrothed once became
To the scion of the house of fame,
Dolphin, a mighty lord
Throughout Harmody adored.
The two houses together ventured
On ships with servants indentured
Across the realm of Harm
To lands where it was warm
Wine-eye Krokan and
Long-thighed Dezeldun
Sailed for many a moon
Trade they made with Goos
Of the House of Octopus
In mercantile ability
Achieved great civility.
The rate of exchange was great
Profitable was the freight
From ships laden with goods
Like rain upon Par-quds
That for long aeons fell
As Harm’s realm did swell.
Tax benefits did accrue
To the Three Houses Great and True
As Pendel-bar’s thunderous shield
Cleaved on watery field,
As Hazaltar slew the marg
So sailed to Harmody carg-
o, rich and true
On Harm’s plain of blue.

I kid you not.

That night, during dinner the visiting steward of the House of Otter was poisoned! The steward of the House of Dolphin immediately proclaimed Ham to be the prime suspect, since he had (1) been caught rifling through belongings in someone else’s room (2) had been thrown in the oubliette overnight (3) had quarrelled with the Dolphin steward, and had been heard threatening revenge, (4) had poison, cheese and extra socks in his bag, and (5) had been seen climbing out a castle window while wearing a maid’s outfit.

The guards searched the town for Ham and found him easily enough — he wasn’t trying to hide, and of course, I wasn’t about to warn him. Now, Ham had in fact done all of the things attributed to him, except for the actual crime of poisoning the Otter steward. In spite of being innocent, you must admit that the circumstantial case was damning. Benel immediately disavowed all knowledge and association with Ham, believing him to be utterly guilty.

(To be continued)

Like Moths to a Flame

I have just added on to a summary already written by Brian:

The party ran into a rather large ice-golem that seemed to be immune to the pink light. Trust me — the first thing we did was have Merath zorch it, so she
stayed firmly in character (Wendy was absent this session). After that didn’t work, Merath cleverly cursed it so that its ice became rotted and brittle. Nathan found a giant bow in the chamber, but he wasn’t strong enough to draw it. Marath quickly blessed him to increase his strength. This allowed Nathan to shatter the golem with a couple of well-placed arrows, which was a good thing, because Jacob the Mighty (TM) was busy rolling 1’s. We learned an important lesson about ice golems, though — splitting an ice golem in two gets you two full-sized ice golems. So although there was some clever strategy and teamwork in evidence, we required the legendary cunning of Bastriel to get us out of this mess (Editor: This was in Brian’s original version).

After extricating ourselves from the Golem Menace, we wandered about the caverns, finding that they exhibited some odd physical properties. This was quickly dubbed the “Scooby-Doo Effect” as we found that when we left the central room via one passagway, we almost always returned to the central room via another passage.

Trail and error finally worked in our favor and we stumbled upon the a small “city” of humanoid moths (we had run into one such fellow a bit earlier in the evening). Bastriel straining the limits of his diplomatic skill instructed the Mothmen to “Take me to your leader,” and surprisingly enough they complied. Queen Mothra is her name, a blue-skinned beauty (much to Bastriel’s delight), and she informed the party, due in large part to Nathan’s gentle manuevering of the conversation, that all is not right in Moth-ville. Being heroes, the party looks like they are going to help, and there have been knowing glances exchanged about perhaps adding the mothmen to the Rose Kingdom’s faithful subjects.